I've had a rough week. It could have been much worse, but it was plenty difficult as it was.
A member of my church family, Mr. Norman A. Freese, died. Norm was born on January 2, 1932, so he lived a long and very full and rewarding life. He had four children with his lovely wife, Jean, and the youngest one - Walter - gave one of the most moving speeches I have ever heard at a memorial service. He listed His Top Ten favorite memories of his father. They were all wonderful and funny - down-to-earth and not sad at all. Except when Walt's voice would break and he would have to stop for a moment. Each time this happened, I cried, too.
I cried the hardest, perhaps, because I had never heard these stories, and they made me want to know Norm better.
Only the time for that is past.
And I have to wonder why we haven't made it a tradition to honor people with a tribute when they're alive. Oh, sure, celebrities have their roasts, but why don't we have anything nice and pleasant for the rest of us? We ought to. We ought to share those stories and memories with others so they have a chance to get a little closer while we're still around, you know?
I knew Norm through our church chancel choir. He was a bass, and I was an alto. He sat behind me until two things happened somewhat simultaneously: he decided to leave the choir for health reasons, and I was diagnosed as a soprano and promptly reassigned to the front row, stage left.
Norm was funny. I can't remember any of his lines, specifically, but they made me snicker on a regular basis. He was born in Queens, NY, and even after all this time in Indiana, you could cut his accent with a knife. Norm was very supportive of me joining the Praise Band, and he was always telling me to "step up" and "come out of my shell" and "just sing for Jesus, honey."
As a matter of fact, the last conversation I had with him was about a week before his death. He came up to me after church and told me he was so proud of me for singing out and sharing this gift God had given me.
And now I'm crying again.
I am a little concerned for his wife of over 50 years - Jean. She is legally blind, but the one daughter who lives in Indianapolis lives with her, so I'm hoping there will be no need to relocate Jean - either to a nursing home, or, worse, to the homes of one of her other children. I think it would hurt her terribly to leave her church family here and all of her friends.
Norm will be missed by many, many people. We all know he's with God and perfectly content now, but I hate how much it hurts me that I will never see him again in this world. However, I would rather have the hurt than forego the joy of knowing him.
God bless you, Norm, and thank you so much for all the brightness you brought into my life. The world lost one of the Good Guys when it lost you.
Hi, Deborah. What a lovely tribute. Thinking of you...
Posted by: Anne Gaal | May 11, 2009 at 03:05 PM
Deborah... Lovely tribute. You are right about the wonderful things some people do- quietly, without a want of recognistion and we don't find out about them until they pass away. Be greatful of having known such an amazing man. God bless. My prayers are with you and his family...
Posted by: Dawn T | May 11, 2009 at 05:05 PM
sweet memories of someone who was a positive influence in your life...thanks for sharing your heart!
Posted by: Nancyljk | May 11, 2009 at 06:55 PM
Such a Wonderful tribute Deborah....Your in my thoughts and prayers....
Posted by: Kelly Booth | May 11, 2009 at 07:21 PM
Hi Deborah,
I feel for you, your family & for Norm's family. Just remember that he still lives on everytime you think of him & through the things that he has done. So even though he may not be here physically he is still here in spirit. Take care thinking of you big big hugs xoxoxo
Posted by: paula | May 11, 2009 at 08:14 PM
Deborah! Thinking of you and saying a prayer. Lots of hugs!
Posted by: stampersuzz | May 11, 2009 at 09:14 PM
Deborah, what a lovely tribute to Norm. I can't help but picture him (though I don't know what he looks like), dancing in heaven with Jesus, and maybe still making the same kind of comments that would make you snicker. :) Even so, I know it doesn't erase the sorrow of his loss here on earth, experienced by those who loved him dearly. I'm glad to know that his wife, Jean, lives with a daughter already. I'll pray for them and for you. Big HUGS!
Posted by: Patty Y. | May 12, 2009 at 02:08 AM
Beautiful tribute to a man who inspired you and challenged you! What a loving and compassionate spirit you have, Deborah. Love and hugs. Prayers, too.
Posted by: judyjung | May 12, 2009 at 10:23 AM
Hey Deborah. Such a great tribute to your friend & loved one...you are in my thoughts & prayers.
Posted by: Jenn Biederman | May 12, 2009 at 10:40 PM